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NEW BATMAN/POKEMON SHOWS ANNOUNCED!
APOCALYPSE LOOMING....

KIDS'WB! ANNOUNCES YET MORE ANNOYING POKEMON-RELATED SHOWS! KIDS'WB! COMMENTS: "BE ORIGINAL? WHY? WE'RE MAKING MONEY!!!"

Enter Date Here, 2001

In a desperate attempt to keep children across the world brainwashed, Kids'WB! has decided to meld the popular Pokemon characters with their other WB shows. "This is a great way for us to get more money -- ah -- we mean...ah hell, why lie? We want money!!"
Kids'WB! will be making two BATMAN - POKEMON combined shows. One will be light-hearted feel that Kids'WB! believes that everyone can relate to. The other show will be a bit more darker, but Kids'WB! still thinks that anyone can relate to it. Especially the drama in their lives. The 1st show will be called:

THE NEW POKE-BATMAN/POKEMON POKEADVENTURES IN THE POKEFUN POKEWORLD OF POKEMON.
Kids'WB! said they wanted to make the kids would know that Pokemon would be an intregal part to this hour long show, which will air about 12 times during the weekday schedule, maybe more, depending on how many times they can re-edit the same 13 episodes. Kids'WB! says: "In this show we've de-aged Batman into Ash, who will be a bit lighter, and for no reason other than saying the word "wood" alot, he'll have a wooden leg. How did he get the wooden leg? Simple: One day Ash went completely insane and got a chainsaw and went after his Pokemon and tripped and cut his leg. We're also drawing some influence from the movie ARMY OF DARKNESS! I'm sure kids loved that movie! Heck, the main character was named 'Ash'!"

They had more to say: "Pickachu and Bat-Ash will fight crime using various techniques like being annoying, and just standing there. No doubt crooks will run in absolute horror! Also, Ash will be a bit darker and will eventually become an alcoholic which will lead to a special Sweeps episode called: "PIKACHU! GIMME MY...eerp...KEYS! I..CAN DWIVE...." where Pikachu must stop an under-age Ash from stealing and driving a car. Will Pikachu stop Ash, or just let him die?"

Kids'WB! dropped a hint about the episode:

"We can't give anything away, but the next title for the next two episodes will be "ASH'S FUNERAL" and "PIKACHU GETS A NEW PARTNER!" We know everyone will be surprised to find out what happens! We don't wanna give anything away! We always try not to give away ANY spoilers!"

The other Batman/Pokemon show will be called: "POKEMON FUNTIME IN GOTHAM!". According to Kids'WB! it will be a hard edged drama with all-new characters, but the main Pokemon will be Charmander, who keeps burning people to death! Kooky!"
Kids'WB! provided a run down of characters:

TASH - A female Pokemon lover who wants to be a trainer.
CROCK - A wise cracking teenage boy who loves Pokemon and constantly swwons over girls.
TISTY - A guy with an attitude. He's a ticking time bomb waiting to explode!

"These characters are completely original, and they will square off against Gotham's viliest. This show will air four times on the weekend, as well as 6 times on weekdays, whenever POKEMON is not airing. This hard edged drama will have our heroes fall deep into the world of prostitution and cock fights. In one episode TASH must decide whether or not to save her best friend Andy. In the following episode "ANDY'S DEAD", we will discover what she does! We're sure to pull in the ratings!"

Kids'WB! also noted how glad they were to combine Batman with Pokemon. "Sure, the real Batman, or even Terry McGinnis, never shows up, it will be very influenced by Batman. We'll see hints to what happen to the Batcrew in almost every episode which will lead to a very special episode where we learn whether or not Bruce Wayne gave Robin that bottle of Ritalin so he would calm down. I'm sure every can relate to Ritalin, or has at least over-dosed on it."

Kids'WB! also plans for more musical guests to appear as hosts for the weekend. For the month of November we have:
1st weekend "SLAYER KILLS EVERYONE!" Day!
2nd weekend "NINE INCH NAILS YOUR COFFIN SHUT!" Day!
3rd weekend "ANAL CUNT'S HOME COOKING WEEKEND!" Day!*
4th weekend "SPICE GIRLS MASSACRE WEEKEND!" Day!

*Anal Cunt is an actual hardcore speed punk group.

"We may also throw in some Batman, too!" Kids'WB! added!, "We're so glad to deal with classic characters like BRUCE DRAKE, TIM WAYNE, DICK GORDON HOWE, and BARBARA GREYHOUND! It's been our dream! We've been following these characters for years!"


CONTACTS: Janice Aguilar-Herrero
Kids’ WB! Publicity
818-966-6666
Lesley Barricella
Kids’ WB! Publicity
818-966-6666

 

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